Wednesday, 29 September 2010

Just When You Thought That Bran Based Cereal Couldn't Get More Depressing.....


Hi, my name's Henry. When a leading food manufacturer asked me to appear in a nationwide newspaper advertising campaign in 1955, I was thrilled. I mean, who wouldn't be? Look at the men pictured above; they look great! Straddling pylons, pointing at us while puffing on pipes, giving cheery, masculine waves in their well-cut suits... "Sign me up!", I cried, "I can't wait to look suave! I'm going to phone my mum!"

Here is my ad:


When I first saw it, I was a little disappointed. I thought that the whole constipation thing was embarrassing and I was troubled by what seemed to me to be a sad, empty desperate void behind my eager-to-please eyes.

My mum told me that I'm being silly, however, and that I look just as smart as all those other guys. She's sent copies of the advert to all our friends and family and, when they laugh hysterically, Mum just tells me that they're jealous.

Thanks Mum!

All adverts taken from September 1955 editions of The Orcadian.

2 comments:

  1. That's brilliant! What a claim to fame and certainly one for the family album.

    Hope you're nice and regular now :0)

    @missielizzieb

    ReplyDelete
  2. Clear sparkly eyes and clear sparkly intestines, Henry :-)

    ReplyDelete

Are you delighted by what you have just read? Are you revulsed and appalled? Do let us know, we'd love to hear from you.