Monday, 20 September 2010

'Oui....un petit, petit, petit peu...'

It has been a cultural day at Orkney Archives.

First of all, our valiant leader has returned from France bearing a load of French delicacies. After we had all struggled to open the little sealed packets which the tartlets came in, we munched contemplatively whilst making mmmmmm noises. Proud that we could remember the word for 'cherries' from French at school, we  crossed off 'gastronomic appreciation' on the fancy pass-time list in our heads.

Next, I felt smug when a customer came in to enquire about the Melsetter house papers. He was researching the visit of two members of the Bloomsbury Group, painter Duncan Grant and economist John Maynard Keynes to the house in 1908. "Ah" I said nodding my head knowledgeably, "yes, economist John Maynard Keynes...". The customer does not need to know that the sum total of my knowledge is that there was once an economist called John Maynard Keynes.

Anyway, Keynsian theory was recently re embraced by Western economies and is behind the fiscal stimulation idea that if we all just keep spending like fools then everything will come out in the wash (to summarise.) Thanks wikipedia.

Literature was crossed off when researching an enquiry on the genealogy of the Orkney Earldom. A customer was keen to find out if the poetic talents of both Rognvald Eysteinson and his son Turf Einar, were passed down to their descendants. I could not find any evidence of this until I came upon this poem by the excellently named Snaekoll Gunnason:

The Poet complains of being captured while on business in Norway

I shall never,
though I live for ever,
ask for business
in South Moer,
since enemies
took me from there
to Bergen
at the king's command.


Here is my poem in homage :

The poet complains about being aggressively sale-pitched whilst visiting the bank.

I shall never,
though I live forever,
use a credit card
for my Lovefilm,
nor do I want
to buy a mortgage,
as I have one.
Stop reading my purchase history.

That will show them, I think.


  1. Ah! I think I may have to borrow the poetry idea for the next time the phone company calls to offer me TV services. Thank you. They will be nonplussed, I think.

  2. You're welcome. Poetry can and will be used to defeat evil 'up-selling'.


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